Unisex bathrooms and the accommodation of transgender individuals has been in the news a lot. Regulations in Washington now require universal access to bathrooms, allowing transgender individuals to use bathrooms consistent to their gender identity. The legislature has attempted to block that. Other states have gone further in their anti-equality agenda.
People are concerned with privacy and safety, and are confused about line drawing. If a line is not drawn here, then where can it be drawn? But the questions of reasonable people get drowned out by the misguided or opportunistic whose only goal is to segregate and embarrass based on gender identity. It is deeply disturbing the kind of hate and fear mongering that has surrounded this issue.
I am on the edges of the Bathroom Wars. As a stay-at-home father raising two young daughters, every day that we go out in public, I have to make a conscious decision on which bathroom is appropriate to use. It’s unusual to see a guy standing out in front of the women’s room in the middle of the day. I get to be that guy.
In many ways, we are lucky. We get to make the decision on which bathroom to visit based on cleanliness and access, but generally we make it from a position of complete safety. No one is going to mess with the crazy dad guarding his daughters’ bathroom stall. That is not afforded to many transgender as they are threatened or harassed for choosing “wrong.” This experience has given me a deep empathy for what transgender individuals experience.
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| Obligatory Mr. Mom poster. |
I've also gotten a different perspective than many families may have. That perspective boils down to two things: First, unisex bathrooms and universal access improve life for everyone. Second, the problem is not people, it’s the facilities themselves.
