The Most Important Voter

Unfortunately, the age of 40 is quickly approaching, less than a year away. I've had to deal with certain aging pains. Sports stars my age have been hitting retirement. I'm almost half paid off on my student loans. Four-door sedans have a certain appeal.

Sexy. And with a heated steering wheel.

And certain possibilities are starting to fall by the wayside. Being on a "40 under 40" list is becoming a remote possibility. The untold millions I expect to make (or win) will be spent on responsible things, not youthful exuberance. If I'm not on a presidential ticket this election, it will be impossible to become the youngest president.

Of course, those elections are increasingly difficult. Mostly because I am not being pandered to properly.  I am, after all, the most important voter.