Once Again, the Rules for a Proper Hate Obituary

When a divisive figure dies, as is the case with today's passing of Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia, we find ourselves in a very familiar news cycle. Today's surprise is processed to become a retrospective of the person's life. In that retrospective, some warts become points of focus until someone pens a hate obituary. A couple years ago, I saw this happening after the passing of Senator Edward Kennedy. It occurred to me that something felt off about this last stage. Inevitably, with the notoriety of Scalia's positions on contentious issues and his willingness to mouth off about them, the hate obituary train is going to roll again.

Just as the cycle turns, it is time we once again review the three rules for drafting the proper hate obituary:

The Most Important Voter

Unfortunately, the age of 40 is quickly approaching, less than a year away. I've had to deal with certain aging pains. Sports stars my age have been hitting retirement. I'm almost half paid off on my student loans. Four-door sedans have a certain appeal.

Sexy. And with a heated steering wheel.

And certain possibilities are starting to fall by the wayside. Being on a "40 under 40" list is becoming a remote possibility. The untold millions I expect to make (or win) will be spent on responsible things, not youthful exuberance. If I'm not on a presidential ticket this election, it will be impossible to become the youngest president.

Of course, those elections are increasingly difficult. Mostly because I am not being pandered to properly.  I am, after all, the most important voter.

Idle games and the scale of money.

To explain an idle game is to have already lost the war.

Idle games are just that, your car is running. All the time. And you get points. But it’s not your car. It’s your computer. What you hook to that computer as it idles, the sequence you attach those things, and how much patience you have to wait, all determine your success at the game. Hit on the right combination, and the numbers go exponential. Initial clicks that counted by ones, then tens, then hundreds suddenly go into the sextillions and septillions.

Really, it was 10 million years of waiting on the next upgrade.

In short, the only thing worse than explaining an idle game is actually playing one.